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How to shield your kids from the negative effects of divorce

Many parents in New York are so caught up in their divorce battles with their partners that they often fail to consider how their situations affect their children. According to Scientific America, 1.5 million children have parents who are divorced. Many of kids become caught in the middle of things as their parents fight over custody and other important matters. Spouses who are committed to their kids' well-being should pay attention to how their actions during divorce can affect them. 

Here are some ways that parents can protect their kids from the effects of their separations. 

Stop fighting in front of the kids 

Parents who fight in front of their kids create toxic and hostile environments for them. Their actions may lead the children to feel that they need to choose sides or act a certain way. It can also cause them to feel like they are the cause of their parents' separations. Parents should always act as a unified and cohesive front for their kids. They should reserve all arguments and harsh words for when their kids are not around and within hearing distance. Parents should also work together amicably so they can improve their relationships. 

Stop using the kids as an emotional crutch 

Many parents find their situations so challenging to deal with that they often turn to their kids for emotionally support. They tell them about things that should remain private and between adults. Parents who turn to their kids for emotional support often force them to grow up much faster than they should, states Children often find themselves dealing with a lot of stress and emotional turmoil as they struggle to adjust to the new roles their parents are putting them in. 

Parents should turn to their peers, family and friends for any emotional support they may need during and after their divorces. There is nothing wrong with parents informing their kids about things they should know, such as what days they will spend with their other parent. But anything that is not appropriate enough for them to hear or deal with should not be discussed with them. 

Divorces can get messy. But parents who continue to put their kids first and work together can keep them from suffering from the negative aspects of their situations. 

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